1. “That’ll be dollars and cents for yeh.”

This is the only one I really dislike.

When you buy something these days, the person who takes your money is likely to say “That’ll be [whatever the price is] for yeh.”

I often retort: “No, you mean 14 dollars and 30 cents for you, not me.” And usually the person taking my cash or credit card will chuckle and acknowledge the correctness of that.

But it isn’t just the semantic inaccuracy of the phrase that bugs me. It’s the sentiment, like some faux cheerful innocence from the 1950s or something, a throwback to some imagined simpler time.

It’s weird.

(And the 50s weren’t really simple or innocent anyway; schoolkids were ducking and covering under their desks at school, rehearsing nuclear war drills. Quite a not-so-subtle undertone of terror in idyllic post-war America. But I digress …)

2. “No worries.”

I recall “no worries” coming into vogue in the mid to late aughts. The first person who used it on me was a business client.

Again, like “for yeh,” it smacks of a yearning for more innocent times and less complicated feelings.

Or maybe it’s a prayer because, honestly, we’ve all got so many worries these days. (The former client I’m thinking of certainly did. Among other things, he was raising three daughters.)

So I take it as a prayer and I don’t mind it. May we all walk in the world with no worries!

3. “Right?”

Now when exactly did this happen?

I think “Right?” – meaning “No kidding; I couldn’t agree more.” – was also a mid-aught-born phenomenon.

“Right?” stated like a question used to be just a question back in the 20^th century, but now “Right?” actually means “Right!”

I resonate with this for some reason. I think it’s cool. I like the implied inconclusiveness, as if – whatever it is – there is always more thinking we might do about it, regardless of how certain we are. There is a subtle existential humility in the tonal question mark, a recognition of the mystery of things.

4. “Of course!”

My favorite! – and the point of this entire essay really. People now say “of course” in place of “you’re welcome” and I think it’s beautiful.

“You’re welcome” is courteous but a little perfunctory. “Of course!” is generous and warm, and people say it all the time now in response to “thank you,” and it touches my heart.

The other day, I was walking out of the People’s Coop food market in Portland and just as I got to the door to exit, a young man was opening the door and holding it open for the woman he was with (his girlfriend?) to enter. Our eyes met, I think there was a split second of uncertainty or confusion, and then he continued to hold the door for me too.

This was not his original intention, and he could have not done it, but it was a spontaneous choice he made and I said, “Thank you! I was hoping you’d do that!” and he replied “Of course!” with a great big heart-happy smile that lit up his face.

Of Course!

It reminds me of a couple of song lyrics and a poem.

It reminds me of the line in “What a Wonderful World” that goes:

I see friends shaking hands, saying ‘How do you do?‘/
But they’re really saying ‘I love you.‘”

And the last line of the Grateful Dead song “Scarlet Begonias”:

Strangers stopping strangers just to shake their hand/
Everyone was playing in the Heart of Gold band, Heart of Gold band.”

And of course this well-known Hafiz poem:

With That Moon Language
(translated by Daniel Ladinsky)

Admit something:

Everyone you see, you say to them,
‘Love me.’
Of course you do not do this out loud;
otherwise, someone would call the cops.

Still though, think about this,
this great pull in us
to connect.
Why not become the one
who lives with a full moon in each eye
that is always saying,
with that sweet moon language,
what every other eye in this world
is dying to hear?”